


Fragile

by calamariqueen



Series: State of Mind [3]
Category: Final Space (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Polyspace, Restart AU, Suicide Attempt, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-09-27
Packaged: 2019-05-13 00:41:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14738867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calamariqueen/pseuds/calamariqueen
Summary: After a twelfth attempt of suicide, Gary begins to question his morals.





	1. The Twelfth Attempt

**Author's Note:**

> I won't promise a truly happy ending, but enjoy the first chapter in the finale of the 'State of Mind" series!

**A shrill scream** .

 

_ That was the first sound everyone was able to pick up _ .

 

Avocato’s eyes perked up, and Quinn jumped in surprise.

 

Mooncake flew in, tears pricking it’s eyes in a panic.

 

“ _ Crisis Prevention System is now in use _ .” HUE said over the intercom.

 

“Prevention system?” Quinn said.

“HUE, what’s happening?”

 

A group of S.A.M.E.S rushed past them, running across the hallway.

 

“Gary never seems to understand.” HUE said.

“This  _ is _ his twelfth attempt, after all.”

 

“Attempt?” Avocato said.

 

As Avocato pondered, Mooncake zoomed away to the location of the S.A.M.E.S.

 

And then, it hit him.

**The worst possible outcome** .

 

“Quinn, we need to go  _ now _ .” Avocato said bluntly.

 

“What do you mea-” Quinn said, but paused in her wake by a certain robots behavior.

 

**KVN, the Deep Space Insanity Avoidance Companion, was in a panic** .

 

His annoying demeanor had quickly faded away, and was replaced with a serious expression as he grabbed tools from the medical bay.

 

It was at that moment that their legs began to move on their own.

They’d already figured out what HUE meant by these ‘attempts’ that Gary had done.

 

It was not until reached Gary’s quarters that their hearts quickly shattered.

 

**Gary Goodspeed was on a rope, hung and unmoving** .

  
  
  


-

  
  


All that could be heard in that moment was a piercing, petrified scream.

 

**A scream that could nearly rip a person’s throat to shreds** .

 

Quinn immediately took action, while Avocato stood there for a second or two, shaking.

With the assistance of KVN and the S.A.M.E.S, they were able to bring Gary down.

 

The S.A.M.E.S began to perform CPR on Gary immediately, as Quinn and Avocato watched in horror.

Avocato was tugging his tail in distress, his ears flattened as Quinn yelled at the bots to do their job better. He could hear the raw emotion in her voice as it cracked, tears pricking her eyes.

 

Avocato rushed to the medical bay to grab more supplies, and ran back in an instant find a miracle.

 

Quinn screamed out Gary’s name, and hugged him gently.

  
**_Gary was alive_ ** .


	2. Real, Raw Emotions

_ He could see light _ .

He wasn’t in his room anymore-

 

But rather,  **The Medical Bay** .

 

There were two people looking at him, one of them shaking like a leaf, and the other in tears.

There was even a green blob next to them-

 

_ And then he remembered _ .

 

**_He tried to die, and he had failed to do so_ ** .

 

Tears began to prick in his eyes as he slowly sat on the bed. His attire was changed into something more breathable, all the cuts he’d inflicted on himself completely exposed. 

 

“W-We’re so glad you’re o-okay..” Quinn sobbed, as she hugged him tightly.

 

**He should be dead right now** .

  
  


**He should be with his father** -

 

Suddenly, his stomach lurched in dismay. Just the thought of that man, the person he’d looked up to, the person who died on him and never came back, made him feel like vomiting. Not like he hadn’t purged up his food in the past, but it sure felt like he was going to just looking at all the people who’d died on him.

 

The people who sacrificed themselves, the people who risked everything just for his sake.

 

Each breath began to feel like his last, his mind began to go in a spiral. Everything began to feel cold, and all he could do was just run.

 

**But, he wasn’t able to do so** .

 

Avocato held him tight, making sure he wouldn’t move an inch.

 

After a bit of a struggle, Gary gave up, and slouched on the floor of the med bay, burying his head in his knees.

 

**This was irregular** .

 

**_This entire timeline was a mistake_ ** .

 

“Gary.”

 

Avocato stared at Gary, a stern expression on his face.

 

“We want you to be honest with us, right here right now.”

 

He didn’t want to be honest, he couldn’t tell them a thing. They wouldn’t understand a thing he’d say if he told them the raw truth. Even after all the times he’d watched them perish, he still wasn’t used to seeing them after each revival.

He felt that sickening feeling in his stomach again, and he hugged his knees tighter. None of it all mattered because they were going to die. 

They were going to die over and over again and all he could do was just watch and die over and over again losing his mind until he just snapped-

 

_ But then, he heard a faint sniff _ .

 

**He looked up and saw Avocato, beginning to cry** .

 

“We just want to know i-if you’re alright, man.” Avocato said, as his voice began to crack.

 

He could feel his hands take his head out of his knees, and the ventrexian hugged him gently.

His hands were warm, his fur soft and delicate. Just this feeling of _ love _ , this feeling of _ comfort _ -

 

**_That was all it took for the dam to burst open_ ** .

 

Gary buried his head into Avocato’s shoulder, and began to sob. He hugged Avocato tight, as if he were holding on for his life. His nose began to run and every word he said was nothing but a blubber, but for the first time in ages, he finally let out his raw emotions.

Quinn walked over and joined the hug pile, tearing up as well. Avocato rubbed Gary’s back as he wailed an overflow of emotions, muttering words of comfort to him in his ear as he tried his best to comfort Gary.

 

It was almost half and hour of violent sobs and the constant muttering of “ _ I’m sorry _ ” in which Gary finally silenced, and had fallen asleep upon Avocato’s chest.

  
**_For the first time in a series of timelines, Gary was at peace_ ** .


	3. Father

Avocato rubbed Gary’s back as he slept, his face soft like a child’s. It gave him a melancholic feeling, reminding him of his son. He couldn’t help but stare at him as his heart began to melt.

 

_ At the same time, it made him disheartened. _

 

He was going to get Little Cato back, by all means.

 

**Even if it meant him dying by his own hands** .

 

“You okay, Avocato?” Quinn said.

“”You look stressed out.”

 

“I’m fine, it’s just..”

 

Avocato paused his sentence as he looked at Gary.

 

“Never mind.” 

 

-

 

Avocato sighed as he put the glass of whiskey down onto the table.

The thought of his son just couldn’t get out of his head. No matter how hard he tried to think about something else, it would always be there to intrude his mind.

 

“Avocato?” 

 

Quinn came into the room, and noticed the bottle of whiskey beside a small glass.

 

“Okay, what’s going on with you?” Quinn said, putting her hands on Avocato’s shoulders.

“Something’s bugging you, I know it.”

 

“I dunno what you’re talking about.” Avocato said, slurring a bit.

 

“God, you’re drowning yourself in alcohol too..” Quinn said as she dragged Avocato onto the couch.

 

Avocato rested his head on Quinn’s shoulder, hiccuping a little bit.

 

“He reminds me of my boy.”

 

Quinn looked at Avocato, staring off into space.

 

“He’s a great kid. Sociable, happy, living life to the fullest.”

But he was taken by the Lord Commander….and I’ve been thinking.”

 

Avocato’s voice began to crack, as tears pricked his eyes.

 

“ **_Maybe I haven’t been a good father at all to him_ ** .”

 

As the Lord Commander’s former second in command, he couldn’t help but feel guilty about everything he’d done. To be fair, he was a nice father, but he felt that he may have been too neglectful and harsh.

 

**If he weren’t like this, his son wouldn’t have been captured in the first place** .

 

“I-I’m a terrible father,  _ aren’t _ I?” Avocato cracked.

 

Avocato began to cry, and put his hands onto his face as he attempted to cover his tears. He hiccuped a bit, and Quinn patted his back.

 

“If you weren’t a good father, you wouldn’t care about his well-being at all.”

“ **You wouldn’t be so determined to get him back** .”

 

Avocato wiped away his tears, and sighed.

 

“You’re just as amazing as Gary thinks you are, you know?” Avocato said.

 

Quinn blushed, and her eyes darted back and forth.

 

“T-Thanks.” Quinn muttered.

“Speaking of Gary, though..”

 

“ **_Do you think he’ll be alright in the end_ ** ?”

 

“ _ Of course he would, Quinn _ .” HUE said.

 

“H-HUE?” Quinn yelled.

“Have you been listening to us?”

 

“ _ I’m always listening, Quinn _ .” HUE replied.

“ _ I am a vital part of the Galaxy One’s functioning, after all _ .”

 

“While on the subject of Gary, I believe I’ve found some interesting information.”

 

“Information?” Avocato said.

 

“Yes, it is apparent that Gary’s mental state is on the low end of the spectrum, however, there is one factor that I have not considered in the long run.”

 

“ **_Time travel_ ** .”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a bit on the shorter end, but I wanted to put perspective on other characters.. Also, if HUE can detect temporal worms and confirm how long back they can go, maybe he can detect means of time travel that aren't related to just temporal worms...
> 
> Oh, and the next two chapters will be longer than normal, so look forward to more content!


	4. Calm Snow

Gary scribbled on a piece of paper, the pencil shaking in his hands.

 

There had to one timeline where everything went well.

A timeline where everyone was happy.

 

Nightfall may have never seen an outcome where Avocato survives, but that never meant that the timeline in question didn’t exist.

 

_ He just wanted that good ending _ .

**_As long as he got that ending, nothing else mattered to him_ ** .

 

But after what happened a few hours ago, it was clear to him that this timeline played out different than the rest. The camera’s of the Galaxy One had begun to eye him constantly, eyeing him even in the most unlikely of places. 

_ Could HUE be aware of his restarts _ ?

 

“It’s not possible.” Gary pondered.

 

“ **_It couldn’t be_ ** .”

 

HUE was an intelligent system, and he had the ability to detect temporal worms. But there was no possible way he could detect other means of Time Travel.

It was just….impossible to believe.

 

“ _ Chookity _ !”

Suddenly, Mooncake flew into Gary’s quarters, and plopped onto his lap, snuggling him.

The only thing that hasn’t changed was of course, Mooncake, who was as lively as they’d always been.

Mooncake smiled, and Gary gave a small smile back in return. Despite the amount of restarts, Mooncake was someone who’s always be able to make him smile despite all the stress time travel had put upon him.

 

“ **Hey, Gary** ?” 

 

Gary looked over, and Quinn opened the door.

Quinn gave Gary a small smile, and plopped beside Gary on the floor. Gary hid the piece of paper inside of his uniform, and scooted up to Quinn.

 

“Hey, you little  _ treasure token _ .” Gary said, wrapping his arm around Quinn.

“Whatcha coming over here for?”

 

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay, that’s all.” Quinn said, looking away from Gary. 

 

**_Time Travel_ ** .

 

HUE mentioning the concept itself sounded a bit ludicrous. He’d never brought up a temporal worm once during their conversation, but rather taking this as some kind of unnatural phenomenon. It was strange to Quinn, as HUE was talking this up as something that he hadn’t noticed up until now. She’d never seen an AI really think about something to this degree before, something that she thought the Galaxy One’s AI had little capability of doing.

 

Mooncake squished in between the two humans, and make a small, happy squeak. Gary laughed, and Quinn smiled a little bit.

 

“So, Gary.” Quinn asked.

“What do you think of Mooncake, anyway?”

 

“What do you mean?” Gary replied.

 

“You’ve only known this creature for such a short amount of time, and yet you guys have become so close.” Quinn said.

 

“ _ What do you both see in each other, anyway _ ?”

 

Gary let out a breath, and began to speak.

 

“When I’ve thought about it, Mooncake and I are similar in a ton of ways.” Gary replied.

“We’re both high energy people, we’re both kinda optimistic too.”

 

“ **_But in a way, Mooncake and I are pretty lonely people_ ** .”

 

“I guess in the end, we were both looking for a friend, and that’s exactly what we got.”

 

Gary’s eyes began to glisten, and Mooncake gave him a face-hug. Gary laughed, and hugged Mooncake tight as he squeaked in response.

 

“You’ve been thinking about that for a  _ long _ time, haven’t you?” Quinn said.

 

Quinn pulled Gary’s head onto her shoulder, and she sighed.

 

“HUE told us something while you were asleep last night.” She said.

“We didn’t really believe it at first, but it wasn’t me who chose to come here, but rather, Avocato wanted me to talk to you about this.”

 

Gary’s body shook at bit.

 

“ **_You aren’t really our Gary, are you_ ** ?”

 

Gary’s body froze.

It was as if time, no, reality  _ itself _ had stopped.

He could feel his head throb as his heart rate began to rapidly increase, and each breath he took felt like it could be his last.

 

“ **_No_ ** .”

 

He knew this sensation. It was going to happen again.

 

He could feel reality’s demeanor beginning to crumble, and his body began to burn.

 

“ _ This isn’t right, this isn’t right _ .”

 

His vision began to turn black, and his soul withered into the unknown.

 

This was the darker path he’d chosen.

A path of endless suffering and pain, a broken reality.

 

Each loop was a reminder to himself, a  **bold** reminder:

 

**_There’s nothing he could do to change the future_ ** .

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, in the end, this story is going to go on longer than I thought. Let’s just say I’ve been inspired through music.


	5. About Time

“Gary, you’re mental stability is lower than the normal standard today.”

“I’ll have to check you out in a few minutes, it’d be bad for it to worsen.”

 

**_What did I do to deserve this?_ **

 

That is a question Gary had yet to figure out the answer to.

The universe was fairly throwing him for a loop on a co start basis, so why?

He wasn’t a saint, but most of his actions had good intentions. He was considered loyal and upbeat by many, including HUE himself.

He missed those days of happiness.

Everything as a kid was so much simpler. You didn’t have to worry about fairly the amount of things he had to nowadays as an adult. Besides his dad blowing up, there wasn’t much he had to worry about. There were a lot of things going for him.

 

**But in the end, he threw it all away** .

 

He threw everything away just because of a girl he saw at a bar, landing him five years aboard a ship with an AI and an annoying robot who wouldn’t understand what he was going through.

 

**He truly did feel alone in the universe** .

 

Avocato was always going to die.

Quinn was always going to seal the rift with the anti-matter bomb.

Lord Commander would always take Mooncake.

 

**_Nothing would go right in his end_ ** .

 

“ **Gary, I know what you’re trying to do** .”

 

He took the spoon, and sharpened it upon the edge of the table.

 

“I’m going to have to lock you in your quarters again, Gary.”

“ **Please reconsider** .”

 

He slowly grazed the spoon upon his skin, the spoon lightly piercing his skin.

He stared at the spoon for a while. Maybe for once, the universe would spare him.

But at the same time, the universe was already being far too cruel to him.

He gritted his teeth, and threw the spoon across the room.

 

“Are things  _ ever _ going to get better, HUE?” Gary asked.

He sat down on the floor, his legs crossed.

 

“I don’t understand what you’re referring to, Gary.” HUE replied.

“You could be talking about a plethora of things.”

 

“ _ Are you by any chance referring to your father _ ?”

 

Gary could feel his heart begin to swell with anxiety. His eyes began to blur with tears, and he sniffed a bit.

 

“Kind of.” Gary replied.

“There’s a lot of things I’m thinking about.”

 

“I see.” HUE said.

“Are you comfortable about sharing these thoughts with me?”

 

“Not exactly..” Gary replied.

“But I’ve just been thinking a lot...I’m pretty worthless when I think about it.”

 

“There are so many things I could’ve done, so many opportunities I could’ve taken that were wasted all because I wanted a cute girl.”

 

“You’re certainly odd, but you’re  _ certainly _ not worthless Gary.” HUE replied.

“From what I’ve seen, you’re a very loyal individual.”

 

“As in,  _ Captain _ of this ship?” Gary said, chuckling a bit.

 

“ **You’re still a prisoner, Gary** .” HUE replied.

Gary sighed, puffing his cheeks at HUE’s remark.

 

“You’ve still got approximately 536 days left of your sentence, Gary.”

“Maybe when it’s over, I’ll call you the Captain.”

 

“Maybe so.” Gary said, sighing.

 

The Galaxy One chimed, and Gary sighed.

 

“Right on time for curfew.” Gary said.

 

“I’m glad we talked, Gary.” HUE said.

 

Gary smiled, and walked out of the dining hall.

 

“ **_Good night, HUE_ ** .”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, a chapter actually came out! :O  
> I haven’t been in the writing mojo lately, that’s why it took so long to get the chapter out. And also, that’s why it’s short as hell.  
> Chapter 6 is coming in 202883848483939, look forward to it!


	6. The Bittersweet Melancholy of a Midsummer Night’s Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gary conducts a plan to save Avocato from a gruesome fate.

**This was it** . 

He was determined without a doubt, that this was going to be the dividing point.

**_It was going to end right here_ ** .

 

Mooncake lay on his lap, snuggled up against his chest as he smiled at Gary. He smiled looking down upon the creature, which in a series of timelines, was someone who’s never changed a bit. Mooncake was always his pure, adorable self. 

Today was the day that him and Avocato were going to save Little Cato at one of Lord Commander’s base locations. After saving him, Little Cato and Avocato would embrace, and then the bomb atop Little Cato’s back would begin to flare. And then the gruesome, melancholic death of Avocato would commence with no interruptions.

It upset Gary that he’s still felt a single ounce of emotion, despite having to witness his downfall on a repetitive notion.

 

_ Was this a punishment from God himself _ ?

 

**_Hell, was there even a God_ ** ?

 

But, those thoughts were immediately brushed away. His focus was on the game plan, and determination rose up as his heart thumped a war cry.

 

-

 

_ It’s go time _ .

 

Avocato and Gary stood in front of the base’s entrance. It’s presence was incredibly eerie, but Gary was already used to this.

 

“Listen Gary, this is a mission that we  _ probably _ won’t come out of alive.” Avocato said.

 

Gary nodded as Avocato spoke. He was aware of the dangers of this mission, but rather, it was how crucial this moment was that mattered to Gary. 

It’s not a life or death situation for him, but a death flag for Avocato himself.

All Gary strived for was an ideal future.

 

_ An ideal future where everyone was alive and well _ .

 

“ **Let’s murder this raisin to pieces** !”

 

-

 

Fast forward to where the death flags rose their highest.

It’s a scenario that  _ you _ , the reader, are most likely familiar with. 

The Galaxy One was filled with vibrance as the crew was filled with relief. Avocato’s eyes glistened as he embraced his son, hugging him tight. 

Gary’s eyes darted as the bomb on Little Cato’s back taunted him. 

 

**_And then, the fabled sound rang across the Galaxy One_ ** .

 

The bomb began to flicker on Little Cato’s back, and Avocato’s eyes widened in fear.

 

Gary ran, and snatched the bomb from Little Cato’s back as his mind turned into nothing but a single murmur.

 

_ I did it _ .

 

No one had died. Gary’s goal was finally accomplished, and he smiled. The bomb was discarded like he wanted it to be, and there were no casualties in the process.

His lungs were out of breath, his skin cold from the sheer excitement.

_ But alas, his mind was to cluttered to understand the reality of the situation _ .

 

**Because by the time he’d gained a realization, Avocato had already jumped out into the bounds of space to save him** .

**_And in the end, what did it matter_ ** ?

 

Gary’s eyes widened as he saw Avocato bare of protection, and screamed as his lungs began to burn.

 

_ In the end, Avocato would’ve never made it _ .

 

_ Because by the time he’d gotten there, the bomb had already denoted _ .

 

**_It was on that day, that Gary Goodspeed and Avocato, Lord Commander’s former Second in Command, has been imploded in the fabric of space_ ** .

 

-

 

Gary’s eyes bolted open as beads of sweat rolled down his forehead.

_ Another timeline, huh _ -

 

“ **Chookity** !” 

 

It was as if someone had smashed glass onto his head. 

Sitting in front of him was someone he never expected to see, and a setting that was all to familiar.

 

**_Himself and Avocato in ‘friendly’ a game of cards_ ** .

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The tables have begun to turn! My apologies if this chapter is a bit late, things have occurred and I’ve been inactive here for a while. Plus, school’s started and I’m busy with many things. I hope to release chapters as often as I can! See you next time!


End file.
